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I have "finally" one good story for Social Services,rather ONE good story about a social worker out of many here in Ocean County, but many issues remain with this agency, and one long standing issues was confirmed, and must be brought to light! I will shed light on that issue further below.Recently, a homeless single mother,and her four children showed up at my home. These visits are not unusual as an advocate. The moment I receive visits like this, or phone calls the flash backs begin, which take me back to the time my family was homeless, and poorly treated by the system, so I don't waste time to ask vital questions. I'm also very open with letting those in need know I not only encourage them to reach out to me, but want to help in any way I can as the evidence I collect grows.This mother was assisted with shelter through EA (Emergency Assistance),which allowed her through the TRAP (Temporary Rental Assistance Program) to be placed in a hotel, and to start looking for permanent housing through a voucher in the amount of 1,800.00 a month the state would pay for a house/apartment once she found one.Unfortunately, this mother has her son enrolled in the Toms River school district, and Social Services made clear, if she did not go to a work program Monday-Friday from 8am-3:30 pm she would lose all help, and be homeless again. This work study program was located in Toms River as well, but they placed this family in Barnegat! Mean while the mother does not have transportation, so in essence she was set up to fail! Why wasn't she placed in Toms River, so her son could remain consisted in school, and to satisfy services the board placed on this family? I have seen this happen to countless families over, and over again. The social worker tells the intake seeking shelter, they do not have any hotels available in Ocean County, or they have to ship the homeless to Atlantic City Rescue Mission making thing's very difficult for families! Let me jump back a little to 2004,so the following thing's I share will be clearly understood, and show how lack of compassion abounds in this office more often than not! I grew frustrated confronting social workers myself about why they do this? Mainly, because I was told hotels in Ocean County are full. I had to go to the source to find some truth in their defense!I decided to go from hotel to hotel, and place families myself while they waited for Social Services to approve the help they were denied through the appeal process. I had no funds to pay for accommodation, but I had a plan, which worked well for families receiving TANAF (Welfare.) The logic was, if the family was receiving some money it could be applied to shelter in a hotel, but the trick was getting the same reduced rates Social Services receives from local hotel owners. Basically, if a hotel is contracted with Social Services this allows hotel owners to receive payments from this agency to place families at a reduced rate,but if, the family isn't placed by Social Services they have to pay the full rate,which exceeds welfare cash assistance.Forward, I introduced myself to every hotel owner, spoke on behalf of the family in need of shelter, and explained why I do what I do because most owners ask what agency I'm from?! I've been amazed by the amount of compassion these hotel owners have because they ended up reducing the hotel rate for the family in need! I keep in contact with these hotel owners, hence have established a relationship with them, so I'm able to get a family placed at a rate they can afford, until the battles is won at Social Services.Be advised. When meeting with a family, single person,or whom ever has a need a lot of time must be spent with them before advocating.I have to make sure the need is real,and to determine the cause of homelessness. I will not advocate for someone with an illegal drug dependency to get placed in a hotel by hotel owners I've befriended. I need to count on the fact the rooms will be maintained, and issues aren't brought in, so I can maintain a good relationship with hotel owners.Intervention needs to be set in place, and the issue addressed before high risk groups, such as these are placed on their own, and, if they refuse treatment, then I can not help someone who doesn't want to help themselves first. With that being said,I can say with certainty when this single mother was placed in another town there was availability in Toms River because I spoke to a number of hotel owners who said they have vacancies , so why was she shipped to another town? The short of it was thankfully we got her case over turned by making a few calls, and she was placed in the same town services are provided, and set up with shelter! The social worker was compassionate to the fullest extent, so it is important who you get,however I am one person, and I'm certain many are falling through the cracks, which brings me to my next point. A single mother walked into Social Services with her children seeking shelter. This mother has a five year old son who is enrolled in the Lakewood school system, and she has been struggling with being homeless. The school board said, if she changes her son's school one more time they will have to involve DYFS,so she seeks help from Social Services, and she's told there is no room here in Ocean County! The mother insisted to be placed in Ocean County because of the threat made by the school board, yet the social worker refused to budge, so the mother say's, then I will have to sleep in my car before losing my son! The social worker tells her, if she sleeps in her car she will have to involve DYFS! This needs to stop and it must STOP now! This is a brutal attack, and a slaughtering of families already oppressed by poverty! What are the funds for, all the training these workers go through, the BA's, and all else are useless, if there is no integrity, nor compassion to address the broken! DYFS is a whole other agency, that, also needs to rise to the plate of doing what is right concerning families in poverty, but that is another story for another time! The worse part about it another social worker who's name I cannot mention told me prior to my hearing about this mother, that most workers are taking this "quick to call DYFS" stance, but she stands against it! You don't kick people while they are down, then use it against them! I do not understand how a worker who does something such as this sleeps at night,and if this was done out of burn out from work, then it's time to take a medical leave, or quit the field of Social work all together! Do you know how many great woman, and men today came from poor backgrounds,but it took compassion, and support to help get them there! Do we have such little faith in those in need, that we have to cast them away, and tear their families already in a struggle apart? These acts have not gone unnoticed, nor unheard, and I can testify with great certainty these inhumane acts will not last much longer! There are too many eyes, too many testimonies, documentation, and more evidence that will be brought to light sooner, than later! Most of it is already in the hands it's suppose to be in.

To the attention of:

Barack Obama, US President;
Rick Perry, Governor of Texas;
US Senators from Texas: John Cornyn, Kay Bailey Hutchison;
US Representatives from Texas: Al Green, Blake Farenthold, Charles A. Gonzalez, Chet Edwards, Eddie Bernice Johnson, Francisco R. Canseco, Gene Green, Henry Cuellar, Jeb Hensarling, Joe Barton, John Abney Culberson, John R. Carter, K. Michael Conaway, Kay Granger, Kenny Marchant, Kevin Brady, Lamar Smith, Lloyd Doggett, Louie Gohmert, Mac Thornberry, Michael C. Burgess, Michael T. McCaul, Pete Olson, Pete Sessions, Ralph M. Hall, Randy Neugebauer, Ron Paul, Ruben Hinojosa, Sam Johnson, Sheila Jackson Lee, Silvestre Reyes, Ted Poe;
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I turned 26 on Friday. I have not had any parents until I found my father in prison last year. Through the grace of God I have made it this far. I was a victim of sexual and physical abuse from my family, mostly my mother. My father was absent and a drug user. Until I was 15, I did not know what was done to me wrong. It took CPS four cases of assault and an arrest of my mother to place me with my father's mother, who then would tell me she could not afford me at 16. Texas law is 17 to live without a guardian and from 16 until 17, I was basically homeless. I could not finish high school. One day I got on my knees to pray, and I was able to leave an apartment full of drug addicts. I stopped doing drugs when I walked into my community college to sign up for classes. I earned my associates.
I now want to be a teacher. I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, depression and anxiety. I am going on my third day without sleep. I moved from an unsafe neighborhood 2 months ago. I lived there until I was all most killed one night. I have tried to find the property owner, but found a blueprint of the apartments. I lived there from September 2008 until March 2011. I washed my clothes in my sink, I was too scared to be out past dark.
 I now live in a place that is not paid for. The owners showed up after a 3 month delay in rent to collect money. One charity refused me because they do not pay first months rent. I called again to be hung up on. I have called Catholic Charities, Interfaith Ministries, the Salvation Army, and community outreach programs. I do not have a child, I am not married. I am a single women never married or with child trying to make it.  I work as a substituting the past two years I have been layed off. I do not have valid registration sticker on my car. I walk. I have already received a warning for it. My doctor supplied me with medication for two months and I am going through a victim's rehabilitation abuse program. My time has ran out.My father is out of prison but worse off. My mother is still on drugs. Please help me. my email is magdelenasky05@yahoo.com and number is 832-425-7988. i stay in houston, texas.I should not be alive but by God's Grace I am. I am old enough to remember these horrible memories that CPS or the law failed to recognize. My half sister was abused too before me. She ran and now she has paranoid schizophrenia, seizures, bi-polar mania. My mother was arrested twice for each of us. How did CPS fail to recognize this woman not to be a fit parent? We lived with drug dealers. Not only did my mother trick the system once but did it again by not only molesting, abusing, and exploiting me, she gets to live consequence free. I have flashbacks of her with guns, knifes, ropes, lighters. help me.

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Post Open Letter to your Elected Representatives

Hi eveybody, I haven't been participating lately but I'm back.  I hope everything is ok or at least better.  I have been on the computer hours a day learning about the system and how to work with it and where to get help for a lot of things.  If I can help anyone research an agency for help please let me know, I'll do my best.

I was having a hard time getting a job down here in Miami without being bi-lingual but I ran accross a system that taught me so quick and easy I now have to turn jobs down, if this is one of your problems about getting a job, let me know.

Well anyway I was just checking in.  

RASA Survivors, like me, was born out of horrendous reasons, but does tremendous reaching out to people who have no clue where to go, who to trust, how to go on, and more. Unless you are a victim, you really have no idea how tough it really is. For one thing, take everything you ever learned about justice and throw it out the broken window. The legislatures MEAN well, but without consistent following through and penalties that match the crimes - until we rate humans higher than material possessions -it's a failed system. In fact, the majority of really bad crime, happens after the victim finally puts their proverbial foot down. A protective order, for instance, will hurt the victim if it's not been obtained in a court of law, however for the victim, it can mean an abuse sentence or much worse.



The number one cause of death to pregnant women? Their husbands or boyfriends. Yep. And God forbid the kids see it or live it, was well.



Let me introduce you to RASA Survivors. Many of you know I have a technical problem with the term "survivor" instead of victim, but the point is what matters (for those wondering... yes, I survived my two rapes by the same man who molested at least one of my daughters in five different jurisdictions, but at what cost? It's been eight year and we are still in court, we still are unable to move anywhere without permission. Each ring of the bell, knock on the door can start it all over. We have stalking and harassing going on sometimes 24 hours a day, which includes veiled death threats in our local paper and on his public community blogs. We are victims. We may always be. We haven't survived, we only lived through it and deal with it again and again, every single day. The term survivor is to push us away. We don't ask why the perp gets a lawyer and not only do we not get one, but we aren't even in charge, were are but "MERE WITNESSES."



I could go on... but I am exhausted. No sleep. I'll be back. In the meantime, check out my new friend's website, blog, and information.



"RASA Survivors was created for survivors and secondary survivors of Rape and Sexual Assault. NOTE: I said SURVIVORS!! Although victimized, we have survived and this site is for survival techniques and ideas. Friendships, formed from a positive light rather than a focus on negative memories from your incident."